People Can't Believe What FFL Staff is Using to Clean Their Floors (Hint: It's Lightning)

FFL Janitor-In-Chief Andy Dryer

About a month ago, Foods For Living started using bottled lightning to clean its floors.
"They've been using it at Hogwarts, of course, and a lot of the other Sorcerers' Colleges for awhile now, and it's in keeping with our goal to run the greenest operation possible," says FFL General Manager and presiding Archmage Kirk Marrison. "What's greener than magic? We've got a lot of very pleased apprentices."

OK, none of that happened, exactly, but the core of the truth is there. Foods For Living is cleaning its floors with something that smells like the lightning. This is not my attempt at poetry. That specific scent that accompanies charged, pre-storm air and yellow skies—that's what Tersano Products' lotus PRO Stabilized Aqueous Ozone cleaner smells like.

Yes, this is a blog entry about a cleaning product, and it's not an advertisement, and I'm going to ask that you're just a bit patient, because I'm basically letting you peer into the future of cleaning.

As I was saying, that storm harbinger scent, crisp and sweet, is ozone. Ozone—whose name comes from the Greek, literally meaning "to smell,"—is formed when electricity splits nitrogen and oxygen into nitric oxide and ozone. Lightning causes such a split, beefing up the oxygen molecules there with an extra oxygen atom, and voila, we have ozone, drifting down and presaging the storm.

But we don't need storm power to create ozone here on earth's surface. Tersano Products' lotus PRO product/technology uses a sci-fi-looking machine to create Stabilized Aqueous Ozone. The lotus PRO machine takes regular tap water and converts it into ozone-infused water. Ozone is a natural disinfectant, boasting lethal effect when applied to E.Coli, Salmonella, C-Diff, and other common germs.  It oxidizes bacteria and deodorizes surfaces. I feel like an infomercial host, but I don't mind, because this is no Pocket Fisherman. This technology may revolutionize how the average person is cleaning things over the next decade.

You can also bust ghosts with it.

This ozone-infused water is not entirely stable, meaning that it will revert back to its harmless constituent parts in a few hours. The end product of this process is a totally non-toxic, environmentally friendly, super-effective cleaner that is harmless to humans and infinitely renewable, with no waste component. It's like magic.

Because it's so safe, the cleaning solution doesn't require protective equipment. There's no bleach-burn, sprints to the chemical shower, or watching your cat keel over after it licks the countertop.

Again, this is not an advertisement.

The 2nd most sophisticated cleaner on earth.

To prove that I'm an enthusiast for this new tech, and Foods For Living's choice to embrace it on my recommendation*, I called up Matt Grimwood with Tersano Products to ask him how it feels to almost literally trap lightning in a bottle.

It's best to imagine us talking to holographic projections of each other. I didn't record our phone call, so I'll clue you in on some specifics with a dubiously journalistic Q+A format full of my paraphrases of his answers.

Tersano Products lotus PRO FAQ (Again, these are not direct quotes from the company or Mr. Grimwood, but rather my interpretations of what Mr. Grimwood told me.)

Q: Is this the world's most comprehensive cleaner?
A: Probably. It's more effective than bleach, and you can use it almost anywhere safely.

Q: How can we be sure it's actually cleaning anything? Do we have to take your word for it?
A: You don't have to take our word for it. The government issues certifications for cleaning products. The ratings involve funky units like ORP (Oxygen Reduction Potential). Our product is rated at 650 ORP.

Q: How long can I use a single batch of this stuff and know it's actually cleaning?
A: Right now, we're certified for 24 hours at full strength. Our scientists, who I imagine working in a building like the police HQ in Minority Report, are developing a product that will remain full strength for 8 days.
Q:Wow.
A: Yeah.

Q: How much does a unit cost? Say, a unit big enough to clean a middle school? Those things are filthy.
A: $3000 USD.

Q: That sounds expensive, but I imagine large institutions see the potential for passing the break-even point pretty quickly.
A: Absolutely. The University of Michigan—
Q: Boo.
A: —just purchased 100 of our units. A lot of universities and companies interested in going greener love our product, and it makes business sense for them.

Q: It sounds like you're selling something with no downside. Is this going to turn out like an auto industry scenario, where companies with big money and vested interest will try and suppress your distribution so they can continue to sell their less-efficient products?**
A: Perhaps. We are already running into that sort of thing. There are companies offering other sorts of "empowered water" cleaning products, but none of them are using our tech. Ours is better, from a scientific standpoint. It's cleaner and more effective. Their approaches are very different, and involve things like salt.

Q: Are you flattered by the imitators, or worried, or both?
A: More flattered than worried. Our founder/president actually created the process we use for the lotus PRO. Before that, stabilizing aqueous ozone was impractical. It only retained its efficacy for 5-15 minutes, so people couldn't get the mop bucket into the hallway in time to clean anything.
Q: Because janitors tend to be sluggish, or at least move at their own pace.
A: Uh, no...

Q: Do you think this has the potential to change the societal landscape? Like the Precrime Unit in Steven Spielberg's "Minority Report"?
A: Did you just watch Minority Report or something?
Q: Yes.
A: Our product is definitely a game-changer. We sell the module, and then we're done doing business, aside from support and customer service. Until recently, cleaning products were like any other diminishing product—every customer was a repeat customer, and they needed to restock regularly. Obviously, there are lots of big businesses that would not like to see this dynamic disrupted.

Q: What's been your biggest obstacle? The ignorance of the hoi polloi concerning the intersection of science and sanitation?
A: ...no. The main obstacles are marketplace-related. Department stores want to dictate the price of our product, and we can't always come to an agreement.
Q: So there's a conspiracy.
A: That's not what I said.

I'd like to thank Matt Grimwood for talking to me at length, and especially for allowing me to liberally reconstruct our conversation.

If you'd like to learn more about Tersano and its products, here are some links:

http://hospitalnews.com/going-better-than-green-for-cleaning/

http://www.tersano.com/portfolio/going-green-lotus-pro-cleaning-system/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4cTJscm9Bg

Next time you're in Foods For Living, make sure you put your nose to the floor. That's the smell of the future, and that smell is magic. And science.






*not true
** You'll see that I'm joking if you follow the links.